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~ Evelyn Foreman

BIRTH

Going from FEAR to JOY when it comes to giving birth

For so many, being pregnant and the process of birth brings about the energy of fear – which is understandable, but isn’t TRUTH.

Birth is a celebration of an entrance – the true BIRTH-DAY of a soul – your baby’s soul! And Mom is the vessel for this amazing transformation of life. Childbirth is a physical process, but it is also a sacred time for a woman and her family. This holds true especially for those of us who choose to birth in New York City.

However, birthing in itself is a rite of passage that brings about our most primal capabilities and triggers our most fundamental instincts. The nine (9) months of pregnancy and birthing integrates our spiritual, emotional and physical bodies. For this reason, we need to prepare for this important passage as though we are preparing for an Olympic triathlon: body, mind and spirit alike.

As we undergo the process of preparation for this new life, we, as parents are “reborn” on a physical, emotional and spiritual level (at the very least!). As our babies transition from our body to the outside world, we, as parents live along side this metamorphic transformation from being who we were to who we are.

It is safe to say that parents who have children are profoundly different than singles, or couples who have not undergone the process of bearing, giving and raising new life. It takes immense maturity and an ever giving sense of selflessness that changes us for the better. We live in parallel to the life we give and nurture.

For any person who practices mindful living and consciousness, choosing to learn about and practicing “gentle birth” is a natural option. For those who are curious, it is an EXCELLENT time to start!

Natural birth is NOT unassisted birth. No one is in the barn yard, bearing down on you to painfully squeeze a watermelon out of a straw at a moment’s notice. Natural birth is gentle birth. Natural birth is an assisted, mindfully prepared process where the woman joyfully works hard (labor is hard work, after all!) to allow her body to open for her baby to enter our world.

Gentle birth is allowing the release of our bodies’ natural endorphins (endorphins are natural hormones generated during the labor process that opens your body, softening the tissues, ligaments and joints that allow baby to come) thereby enable birth to naturally and gently occur.

How can one imagine birth as joyful? (…Especially when the process of giving birth is depicted as something to endure rather than something that is a true privilege of life?)

As human beings, we are naturally afraid of what we do not know. We must first go beyond the fear. How to go beyond the fear and arrive at the joy of giving birth:

1. Get Educated
2. Let it Process: Allow time and dialogue to settle any inconsistencies and confusion
3. Practice, practice, practice!

The first course of action is to get educated. Go through the process of getting to know what being pregnant and birthing is all about. When you learn something new, let it “simmer:” Does it make sense? Does it align with your philosophy? How do you feel about what you have learned?

Allow your conscious brain to process what you have learned and allow it rests with you: does what you have read/learned/was told resonate? Just because you read it somewhere does not make it true for you. You must feel aligned with the process which you are learning about in order to embrace what is true for you.

Lastly, practice is the best preparation. Does an Olympian go to the any event without practice? How many times would one guess that athlete practices on a given day? You, as the birther, is the Olympian in this case. So, the answer is always intrinsically in YOU. You decide what is right and best for you and your body when it comes to practicing. If you need more, do it!

Bradley courses are offered in a span of 12 weeks, allowing real class time to learn about the different positions, but, you will have 12 weeks of your own time to practice what you learn. When it comes time to give birth, positioning will be second nature. You will be knowledgeable about what is happening to your body and will learn to recognize the emotional and physical sign posts of every stage of birth.

In the best of worlds, you will have invested enough time thinking and learning about the physical activity of birthing to integrate your emotional, spiritual and energetic bodies so that they are all “in sync.”

Where do I start?
Getting educated doesn’t mean going out and getting yourself exhausted looking under every rock. However, do what you can so that you feel sufficiently informed about what is happening with you, your emotions, your spirit and your body. Only you know what would be sufficient for you.

I’ve highlighted just some questions to help you get started as you contemplate this process. You may have a lot more on your own list!

The physical process:
- What being pregnant means to your body (your choices and life style and how that has a direct impact on baby while he or she is growing inside you)
- What your body is undergoing during pregnancy and birth
- What your baby is undergoing during pregnancy and birth
- How baby will make his or her arrival to our world.
The emotional process:
- How is my life temporarily and (will) permanently change
- How am I going to handle the changes that are brought about when a baby comes?
- How do I take care of a baby when I am barely managing my own
  life?
- Are we (Am I) ready?
The spiritual process:
- Are we (Am I) ready?
- What does this mean to my personal growth?
- How do I choose to be with this change in my life?
What you will do to participate in this process:
- Will you be present and active? Or do you not care so much about what is happening?
- Do you prefer that someone “handles” everything and you just want to see the baby at the end?
- Is it important to you for you to be fully and completely alert and awake when baby arrives?

On the day that your baby is born, you won’t be in fear because you don’t know what is going on and why the medical personnel are telling you that you need this or that. You will actually have knowledge of the process of birth – and a sense for what your health care providers are talking about - enough to make truly informed decisions and even relax about it. And guess what? Relaxation is what massages those endorphins to release…giving way to the birth of baby.

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