Today in meditation, I sought grounding. I desperately want something to hold fast to that is solid and doesn't move. As I entered into meditation, I felt unstable, like I have nothing solid and unmovable. I pictured the earth in my mind and it is a ball floating in space. If all that I know of solid is connected to a ball floating in space how can I have or be or even understand the idea of "unmovable"? The concept of infinity occurred to me. In finite, that is the opposite of anchored or grounded or unmovable. Unmovable, is infinity
forever moving or is it forever anchored--I don't know. I do however know that it does not comfort me in looking for stability. My mind raced with the idea of infinity though. It occurred to me as if I was learning about infinity that everything and everyone must be infinite in our own realm of understanding. Because everything must have an opposite for us to understand it, it stands to reason that anything or anyone who has ever existed must either now exist or not exist. In order to exist or not exist the opposite is necessarily true. I know, nothing new here but in the pursuit of getting an anchor (something to hold on to) this is just disheartening.
I want refuge from my own thoughts. I want to have something to hold on to and boldly proclaim "This is where I take my stand. I will remain here and not be moved!" I do not want to consider ideas that will challenge my beliefs of God or Love or Possibility. I envisioned a giant Redwood growing beside a fast moving river. The tree is rooted deep in the ground. I held to the tree. with everything in my being I embraced the tree and when any thoughts tried to approach me they were washed away in the river and all I thought of was the tree. I became one with the tree. I wept with fear, with knowledge that the tree will not last forever, here. For now this is all I have , For now, this is my refuge. I am sure there is more and I will return to my refuge to my meditation and hopefully I will find some answers.
With Love and Light,
Cliff
I want refuge from my own thoughts. I want to have something to hold on to and boldly proclaim "This is where I take my stand. I will remain here and not be moved!" I do not want to consider ideas that will challenge my beliefs of God or Love or Possibility. I envisioned a giant Redwood growing beside a fast moving river. The tree is rooted deep in the ground. I held to the tree. with everything in my being I embraced the tree and when any thoughts tried to approach me they were washed away in the river and all I thought of was the tree. I became one with the tree. I wept with fear, with knowledge that the tree will not last forever, here. For now this is all I have , For now, this is my refuge. I am sure there is more and I will return to my refuge to my meditation and hopefully I will find some answers.
With Love and Light,
Cliff
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